Not Just Another Wordpress.com Blog
Did you ever wake up and know…I mean really know, that your week is going all to shit? Well last week was my turn. Not that I actually woke up to the spiritual countenance that comes with a sense of impending doom. Or that I rolled over and a shiver of knowledge went through my spine, but I did have an abrupt awakening.
At 2:45 am a noisy bang reverberated through our house. Of course being the most limber adult in our household I jumped to my feet, grabbed the nearest weapon, and made my way downstairs. I stealthily crept down each step expecting a large, bloodthirsty animal to greet me at any moment. Okay, let’s stop here for a brief moment so that you can clearly envision this sight. Here I was clad in my underpanties (my kids hate that term) and tank top, holding a plastic broom over my head, tiptoeing around the house, flicking on lights as I went. A formidable sight I am sure. Long story short, there were no animals in the traditional sense, just animals in the human sense. Someone, and I use this term loosely,had vandalized my 2 month old Fiat, causing $2801.00 in damage. I know this because the body shop told me so. That was Sunday.
Later in the week, while driving the tin can from the car rental, I was entrapped in a speed trap. Trap, trap….trap trap TRAP! In our subdivision I was tooting along at 61 km in a 50 km zone. I know this for sure because the policeman, with the sassy bravado, told me so.
Next day, my estranged husband, and his lady friend stopped by after his discharge from hospital following quadruple bypass surgery. But no one told me that making him laugh would put him back in the hospital. Doctors should tell people this! Someone had remarked that he had been oxygen deprived for a few months leading up to his surgery. Okay, you know me pretty well. I couldn’t resist saying, “Perhaps for a few years.” Subsequently he began to laugh, grabbed his chest, made some gasping noises and passed out. I told the paramedics that having a wife, and a lady friend, in one room would give anyone a seizure. It turns out he is fine, thankfully. And thankfully my humour is not deadly. So glad to find that out because who knows how many I have put out of their misery with my posts…literally.
So when you get that feeling…that uneasy shadow in the back of your mind…that obvious “I should really stay in bed” message. Do it! Follow it! Stay in that bed! Because we all know that nothing good will come from your getting out of bed. Just a little PSA (public service announcement) for your reading pleasure.
PS. My car is fixed, my husband is on the mend, and I mailed in my ticket penalty!